Rubyjune’s story

“Reaching the decision to divorce my husband had only been reached after many years of agonising. Although divorce was necessary I wanted to avoid as much as possible, any emotional distress to both myself and my husband. The prospect of living independently was both exciting and daunting. I wasn’t completely sure how the process of divorce worked out and didn’t know how to develop a financial settlement. I did not want to exploit my husband but neither did I want to lose out financially.

I was feeling a combination of optimism and excitement as well as trepidation and anxiety. I was also very unsure about the processes that I needed to go through.

My discussions with Claire allowed clarity to develop about what issues needed to be worked on. Before that there were multiple and confusing thoughts about what needed to be addressed. Claire’s style of questioning often made me really think and reflect. The whole point of seeing Claire was to generate new thoughts. To challenge some of my unhelpful idea/thoughts/world views that I held. You don’t want to change what works. It was the tricky/unhelpful thoughts and actions which I wanted to work on.

Quite early in the sessions I was widowed. Some of the issues remained relevant. But mostly we were able to start planning how I wanted my new future to look like. It was a relief not to get focussed on the past, but rather to consider my preferred future.

I had been so ‘caught up’ in my own unhelpful thoughts, I had become disorganised. To manage the situation, I had become overly prescriptive about what I needed to do. Clare’s questions helped me realise how unhelpful/unrealistic my thoughts were. She also provided me with very helpful models/strategies to employ.

I have now been able to let go of unhelpful/out of date thoughts/beliefs. I feel optimistic about my ability to deal with my future.

Claire was very encouraging, uplifting and practical. My sessions with Claire, whilst not therapeutic in intent, had a very therapeutic outcome. I enjoyed meeting with Claire and found the whole experience extremely beneficial.”